Many ladies tell me they want to dance more after the Salsa Class, but men don’t ask them enough. I am sure this isn’t just the case with the Cheltenham Salsa scene. Here you will find 9 of the best techniques for putting this situation right.
#1: On your way in, say “Hi” to men you pass.
That’s all, just “Hi” – as you walk in from the car park, as you stand in line to get in, as you walk to a table to put down your hand bag and coat, as you get a drink from the bar, as you walk to the ladies and back. Just a “Hi”, with a smile, to many men. Even other men – to whom you didn’t say “Hi” – will notice you doing that. That’s often all it takes for you to appear approachable to men, and for you to get lots of invitations to dance.
If you just say “hi”, you will be highly unusual among women (and men) today – in a positive way. At public dances and parties the vast majority of people avoid looking directly at each other. If you simply say, “Hi”, and smile, you set yourself apart as someone who is outwardly friendly. That’s rare in Britain’s social climate, for both sexes!
#2: Don’t waste your time asking men who are hiding.
Men who want to dance often stand near the dance floor. Simply say “Hi” to some of them, smile, and keep walking and circulating. The men who are having a breather from the dance floor will often stay far from the floor, sitting at the sides, or congregating around the bar. Don’t waste time circulating there.
#3: Discover the ‘traffic lanes’.
Sitting in corners with your girl friends wont get you dancing. Look for where most dancers walk onto and leave the dance floor. When you are ready to dance, stand at this area on the edge of the dance floor – on your own. A woman standing alone is – by far – more comfortable for men to approach. Look at the dancers, this shows that you are enjoying what is happening on the dance floor and want to be part of it
#4. Body Language
Refrain from folding your arms. Put your drink down. Move your body slightly, but noticeably, to the feeling of the music, just enough to indicate you are ready to dance. Moving to the music is one of the easiest, non-verbal signals any woman can use to effortlessly attract more invitations to dance.
#5. Do not, DO NOT, look at any men while you’re standing ready to dance.
Looking around makes you appear overly eager and desperate. Men tend to avoid such women. Instead, simply look out at the dancers already on the floor.
At this time, do not say “hi” to any passing men. You wont need to – they will say “hi” to you.
What if you want to dance even more? Is it okay for a woman to approach men to dance? Yes, in these liberated times, that’s perfectly fine and very common, but here’s a tip:
#6. Never ask a man to dance, instead tell the man you want to dance with him.
Simply say, “I’d like to dance with you.” Just that, in exactly those words with a friendly smile on your face. Most women have a lot of experience telling men what they want. And men are used to hearing what women want. So when you tell a man what you want, both of you are in socially familiar territory.
Then it is up to the man to take action. The man might walk you out onto the dance floor right then. Or he might say, “Sure, later”, and find you later on. Or he might say, “Maybe later”, and not find you later, or ever. If that happens, you won’t be terribly embarrassed and neither will he.
#7. Add a touch to your words.
Always use exactly the words, “I’d like to dance with you.” Then – as you say that – touch the man on his hand, arm, elbow, or if you really want to make an impact use one finger tip to caress the top button of his shirt. I guarantee you will get a lot attention from that man, so choose him wisely!
If you are still not getting enough invitations to dance, you can…
#8. Tell several men at the same time.
Walk up to any small group of men and say, “I want to dance with you … and you … and you, too!” Then prepare yourself for lots of fun. And be sure you are wearing comfortable shoes because you are going to be dancing non-stop!
#9. Take part in the Class.
By taking part in the Salsa Class you are already breaking the ice. This will make the fellas more comfortable asking you, or vica versa.
Sure, some of these techniques involve moving outside your comfort zone. As you do so I guarantee that your confidence will increase in other areas of your life as well. Have fun!
Paul
http://www.salsasquad.com